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How to write a good condolence card for a death in 2020 #sympathy #condolence #letter #card #writing

hey everyone good to see ya today's

topic is about condolence cards I was

thinking about this recently because a

friend of mine needed to write a card to

a friend of hers whose mother had died

and she didn't actually know the

person's mother and was wondering what

to write and I got thinking about this

and I you know I hate to think of the

number of cards over the years that I

have not sent because I didn't know what

to write and I somehow I guess magically

thought the words would come to me if I

waited and they never did and I didn't

send it and that is far worse than just

sending off a card and signing your name

or even writing you know I'm sorry for

your loss or something simple like that

but if you want to add a little more to

it than that I want to give you guys a

few ideas today for what you might do so

first of all if you knew the person for

a while sharing any kind of memories is

is helpful so for example maybe it's a

childhood friend and you can recall how

you know their dad was your soccer coach

or their mom used to love playing cards

and you used to love playing cards with

them on Friday nights or anything like

that any kind of memories that you can

share with them that they can hold those

memories maybe they'll keep the card and

refer to it in the future when they want

to hold up those memories or maybe they

you know can share those things with

their kids then and help them get to

know somebody that you know maybe they

didn't get to the full chance to know so

that's one idea

another is any kind of personal quality

that you can share with them like I'll

always remember how kind your dad was or

remember how welcome your mom made me

feel when I'd come and have dinner at

your house or how funny your mom was or

anything like that or even if it's not

that kind of personal quality maybe just

some kind of personal aspect like I'll

always remember what a huge Huskies fan

he was and every time I see the Huskies

I'll smile and think of your dad

something like that can be helpful too

if you really didn't know the person at

all but your friend had maybe talked

about them from time to time you could

say something like I really wish I had

known your mom she sounds like a wonder

person I always loved hearing your

stories about her something along those

lines can be helpful to I'd say the most

important thing is to try to send the

message of this sucks

and I'm here for you as opposed to any

of the kinds of platitudes that we may

often hear around grief in our society

things like you know he's in a better

place now or at least she's not

suffering anymore or really anything

that starts with at least and then

something following that or any kind of

a silver lining

type sentiment you know this isn't

really the time for that it's something

that over time they may come to embrace

some of those ideas themselves but when

someone dies and you're sending a

condolence card those kinds of messages

tend to make people feel misunderstood

you know make their grief feel

invalidated or make them feel like

nobody understands what they're

struggling with so I'd encourage you to

stay away from those kind of platitudes

and try some of the other tips mentioned

here so I hope that's helpful if you

found it helpful please do like this

video and share with with anybody you

know who may also I need these tips you

know sadly right now with the pandemic

going on I feel there might be a lot

more condolence cards needing to be sent

and I hope this will be helpful to you

if you need to do that all right hey

hope you're having a great day bye