How to Write a Memoir | Best Practices for Writing a Memorable Memoir

hey everyone a Bella here in today's

video we're gonna talk about a very

specific type of book that a lot of our

students are writing and that's memoirs


powerful not only for leaving a legacy

behind for your family or friends to

read but also for kind of putting your

life together in a very concise a

version of the lessons that you've

learned and what you've taken away from

life in general so what is a memoir a

memoir is technically a collection of

lessons that you've learned in life with

stories about your life and what your

life has encompassed and your

aspirations and your accomplishments

essentially now an autobiography and my

more differ greatly an autobiography is

kind of more of a chronological telling

of your life versus a memoir which kind

of has a more theme or message or focus

that you also want to give to readers

now people might read an autobiography

to just learn what your life is about

what you did the dates of certain

accomplishments well a memoir is more

about your own perception of your life

and what you learned along the way

today's video I'm gonna break down how

you can actually write a memoir and some

best practices that we recommend in

order to write a successful memoir that

people will actually want to read

because not many people want to read

something like an autobiography unless

you are super famous and people are

writing a research paper about you

whereas a memoir can appeal to a larger

audience even if people don't know you

so here are some twelve solid steps for

writing a memoir step number one choose

your theme or focus now your life is

obviously complex and it's very vast and

that being said you can pick a number of

different themes or messages that you

want to share however with a memoir you

do want to focus on really one

overarching theme that your memoir will

encompass and that's kind of the theme

of your life one of the best ways to

come up with your theme or core focus is

to just sit down and list a bunch of

different themes of your life things

that have really impacted you and what

you've learned the most this is often a

really great way so you can narrow down

what the theme will actually be step

number two is to list out associating

memories with that theme so now that you

have what your core focus will be you

want to look back on your entire life

and think of

all stories all the memories that can

connect to that theme all the things

that you've been through that got you to

the conclusion of where you are when you

want to write your memoir this might

take a few days so feel free to take

your time and just list out as many

memories as you can think of that are

important vital big things in your life

now the ones that are probably gonna be

the most important are gonna be the

easiest to remember simply because those

were obviously impactful moments in your

life because you find them easier to

remember now step number three is pretty

optional but it's really beneficial for

those of you who might not be famous and

people might not know you by name this

is to list out other people's memories

or experiences that can help support

your theme or core focus this is also a

really great way to connect with other

people who have influenced you in your

life maybe there's somebody who is a big

name who is famous that influenced your

life in some way

that has a similar situation to what

you're going through adding those bits

and pieces in can help make your I guess

argument or your theme stronger and more

convincing step number four for writing

a memoir is to write truthfully you

really have to be honest there's

something really really magical and

special about somebody who is just

laying out the truth of their life onto

a paper that is very easy to pick up

when reading readers are not stupid they

can tell them people are being fake or

they're being insincere and that's

something that people don't want to read

they can pick up on that really quickly

and so being truthful often means

admitting your flaws admitting things

that you have messed up in your life now

this can be really hard to deal with it

can be hard to look back on those

difficult times in your life but that is

what's gonna make your memoir special

it's what's gonna give it life and it's

what people will relate to the most

and when people can relate to your story

they can relate to you and that's how

you develop fans so make sure to write

truthfully and be honest about yourself

about what you went through and you'll

find that readers it can digest that and

they will relate to it much easier step

number five when writing a memoir is a

tip that I love is show don't tell now

if you're not familiar with this we have

a video detailing exactly how to do it

and how you can basically uplevel your

writing using this writing tip one thing

to keep in mind though that you don't

have to show and not tell in every

single situation the reason

I say show don't tell is because showing

allows the readers to experience what

you went through versus you just telling

them what happened so a quick example of

showing versus tiling would be we were

great friends that's telling the reader

that you were great friends but you can

share a story in which the reader will

interpret your interaction with that

person as you guys being best friends

and that's showing them what happens

which creates a better experience for

them it makes them feel as though they

are a part of your life versus just

looking at it from the outside and

that's what makes a really impactful

memoir number six is to get vulnerable

your memoir is going to be so much

better it's going to be so much more

meaningful not only to you but to other

readers if you get vulnerable with them

admit your faults admit your fears admit

things that you might not even have

admitted to anybody else before and

that's something that is going to really

set your memoir apart from everybody

else out there who might not be doing

this your life is full of vulnerable

moments you have had times when you hit

your lowest low you had to be vulnerable

or maybe you were forced to be

vulnerable and that was hard for you

write about those times those are things

that people are going to remember about

your memoir step number seven for making

a great memoir is to make connections to

your theme with each personal story that

you share so obviously your my mark can

encompass a few different types of

themes but what's really gonna set it

apart is if you can specifically make

the connections from your memories and

those experiences to the theme directly

this is going to help people learn it's

going to be what people take away from

your memoir instead of just reading a

story about your life they're gonna be

able to take away these tangible

examples of how to get from one place to

another like you did so take that list

that you wrote and step number two and

start making connections if you want to

play connect the dots and you actually

want to cross them and make a list of

your themes and then cross the memories

over the page do that either way you

want to make sure that the experiences

and the memories that you are bringing

forth in your memoir connect to your

theme step number eight to write a great

memoir is to obviously talk about the

current impact of what you've

experienced so a memoir is essentially

you bringing your life into a book the

lessons that you've learned kind of the

key takeaways and you want people to


all of this has affected you in your

current life that's really something

that is really magical and special and

what people want in a memoir they want

to know about your life now but they

want to know how you got there and for

that reason you have to make sure that

you are also connecting what you're

going through the theme with your

current life and what's going on there

step number nine which is my favorite

from memoir and any writing really is to

put your personality into it especially

if it's a book about you people want to

know who you are they want to know your

sense of humor they want to hear jokes

they want to hear you cussed if that's

how you speak make sure that you're just

being you put your personality into it I

always suggest writing how you speak

especially if it's something like a

memoir that's a nonfiction simply

because that's the best way to get a

feel of who you are one way you can do

this is actually to use Google diction

and so you can actually speak the words

onto the page versus writing them but

some of us are better written than

speaking that for me another great way

to add personality is to italicize words

that you emphasize when you're actually

speaking we all have these this and flow

of the way we speak and we emphasize

certain words when we're speaking a

great way to show that and your writing

is to italicize them now don't get

carried away with this or your editor

will roll their eyes and have a field

day but it's a great way to show how you

actually speak in real life so people

can get a feel for you your personality

through your writing step number ten is

to write a memoir that you actually want

to read now think about your memoir your

story your life messages your themes

would you actually pick it up and read

it this is something that not a lot of

people think about they think about

writing a memoir that other people want

to read obviously other people are going

to be reading this memoir but it has to

be something that you're proud of it has

to be something that you're interested

in because that's when the passion comes

through in the writing so think about

your memoir is this something that you

would find impactful in moving and just

important in general if not then kind of

go back and see what can make it better

step number eleven for writing a

fantastic memoir is to be relatable this

is where your stories tie in this is

where your personality comes into play

this is where a lot of the other steps

kind of mesh people want to relate to

you that's what people read memoirs they

want to understand somebody they want to

feel like there are a part of your life

in a way and a lot of that has to be

with being relatable which is done


vulnerability think about when you make

friends the reason that you connect the

reason that you can be friends with

somebody is because you guys can relate

to one another and that often comes

after being vulnerable with one another

so make sure that you're being relatable

so other people don't see your life as

being on this pedestal because no matter

how wonderful your life was there were

hard moments there were moments where

you didn't know if you could get out of

it there are moments that were painful

and those are what is needed in order to

tie this together and last but not least

r12 for writing a good memoir is to make

the message clear right away people

should get a good idea of what your book

is about with a core theme and messages

from the first chapter or even the back

of your book everybody's memoir is a

little bit different and since you might

be somebody who's not super well-known

and you're still writing a memoir you

want people to understand what is really

gonna be about because yes MMR is about

your life but a memoir is not just a

nada biography it's not a chronological

retelling of every part of your life

with dates and all that stuff it is more

of a story with an internal theme it has

a message so you want people to

understand what that is because that's

gonna be why people buy your book after

reading the preview or reading the back

of it and that's how you write a really

good memoir obviously there are many

other steps for writing a memoir so if

you have any tips comment down below

what they are and if you've written a

memoir if you're thinking about writing

a memoir what would your memoirs core

theme or message be mine would likely be

creating your own reality or something

around that now I'm only 24 years old

but that has been a very impactful part

of my life is creating my own life

essentially and going against the grain

so that's something that I would focus

on what would you focus on thanks for

watching guys as always make sure to

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so check that out and make sure to watch

it it's super

informative thanks for hanging out guys

I will see you next time

14 out and then another children's book

on the way which children's books will

my new thing this year

those were fun us a little bit about

this sell more books program this this I

took today and got three books in the

with the number one bestseller you know

up today during the program I went

through an